Random fun stuff Cont...

This is my new friend and his mom..Christian (15)
and his mon Jeannie...He is on the transplant list
He iscurrently awaiting his new heart at TCH

Wendy and I at the Casting Crowns concert

Sarah, Jenny, and me at the comedy place

Connor and me getting ready for the UT vs. Rice game!

Me and the kids at a resturaunt inGalveston

they both had a wad of gum in thier mouth!!



I think that this is all for the fun stuff for now...

Life goes on!!!!!

First

day of school 4th & 1st This is me and the kids at the Aquarium when

we went a few months ago with my mom.

I wanted to let everyone know that even though I am constantly writing about my illness and all that that intales....life still goes on around here. After all the kids still need parents right?

So with this post I will update you on fun stuff that we have been doing and also adding pictures!!!

I will post more later...I am having issues with this thing, so I will give you more fun stuff soon!!

Another Hospital Trip

I am once again writing to everyone about another hospital stay.
I really pray that those of you who read this do not think that I am always doom and gloom, but I am just trying to keep you all updated.

So I was not feeling well again for a few days, I was having chest pain that did not seem to cease. It is a dull pain, but at times it can get worse, especially when I take deep breaths. So I called my dr. and he told me that he wanted me to come in for 24 hr observation.

Wendy (my lovely friend) took me to the hospital, and sat with me while I waited to get admitted and my room.
She also let me hold her fingers and squeeze as hard as I wanted while they put the IV in.. Have I mentioned that I love her dearly..Oh how God is great when he chooses our friends!!!!

So IV is in, now it was time to start getting tests run to see if they could find what was causing the pain...
ECG.......X-RAY......BLOOD WORK.......ECHO......

While I waited for the dr to come in and let me know what he thought I had visits from Travis, my mom, and another wonderful dear God given friend Sarah. (she is such an inspiration for me to live life with GOD in charge and to trust HIM always).I love her dearly also!!!!!!

So around 4:20pm Dr. Kar came in and told me that unfortunately, he could not see what was causing the pain, everything looked normal (well no different than the abnormal it already is).
He said that there could be inflammation of the heart around some of my leads, but the inflammation is so minimal that the ECHO did not pick it up.
He said that he could do a CT Scan to determine where and how bad the inflammation is, but that he did not want to subject me to any radiation if he absolutely did not have to...
So he prescribed me some Hydrocodone with and anti-inflammatory to help with pain and the inflammation.
If the pain continues, I have to contact him and he will schedule the CT....

He told me that we will continue to keep the appointment for the stress test on the 10th of September.

I want to thank everyone for the prayers!!!!
I do not think you will ever know how much I appreciate them all!!!!!

My flesh and my heart may fail,
but GOD is the strength of my heart
and my portion FOREVER.
Psalm 73:26

GOD answers Prayers!!

So I am not sure if any of you know , but I have been praying that God would put me in contact with SOMEONE that I could talk to that has been through all of this on some level.

I did not know why he was not answering this prayer, but today HE DID!!!!!!

I have been put in contact with a lady that has a son who is currently on the transplant list, and he is at Texas Childrens Hospital. Even though they do not live here in Texas, he is here..and we have contacted each other!!!!!

I pray that I am able to show them God's Love, and that they know that I am constantly praying for them and thier family.

I will give you more information when I make sure with my friend that it is ok to put his information on here.

I do know that they would love all the prayers you would be willing to send up for them. They are christians and I just thank God that he has joined us together on this earth.

As for me I am doing ok...I am still tired all the time...I am sure you all get tired of hearing that, but that is what I am doing this blog for...in hopes that God will reach others!

Please continue to pray for my appointment that is on September 10th...for stress test and to see Cardiologist to talk about placement on the transplant list.

I love all of you and do not know what I would do without any of you..
I leave you with these verses this week....

"If only my anguish could be weighed,
and all my misery be placed on the scales!
It would surely outwiegh the sand of the seas".
Job 6:2-3

Though he slay me, yet will I hope in Him.
Job 13:15

Hanging Out

Well the kids left 9 days ago and they finally came home today!!
It was good to see them, I had hopes that since they had been gone so long that they would not act in thier old ways, well I guess that was wishful thinking..only about ten minutes after they got here they where already arguing.

Kids will be kids I guess...

As for me I have been doing ok.. like I said before as long as I do not push myself I am ok, I seem to try and do more when I am feeling OK, I have to watch this because when I do I always pay for it afterwards.

This past 9 days has been restful, Travis and I have gotten to go to dinner with a lot of friends and hang out..it was a lot of fun.. I thank all of you that we did anything with during this past week.

I have been feeling ok..I still have to stop about 3-5 times while I am taking my showers, because I get tired and I am still afraid that I am going to get shocked again..
I have done 1 load of laundry (which I am still not supposed to do) and I managed to get it folded, but Travis had to put it up for me, because I was too short of breath to do it myself after folding it.

My mom is in town for a few days to help out a little. I am glad for the time to visit with her, she is going to make chicken and dumplings for dinner one night while she is here...this is one of my favorite meals (kinda wierd considering I hated it when I was a child).
I would like to ask for you all to pray for her as she is struggling with all of this that is going on. I just do not have words to comfort her....so pray that she finds someone who can do that for her..

So this past week we have jsut been hanging out, kinda nice for a change!! until next week I leave you with this....

He will wipe every tear from their eyes.
There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain,
for the old order of things has passed away.
He who was seated on the throne said, " I am making everything new!"
Then he said, "Write this down, for the words are trustworthyand true."
Revelation 21:4-5

NO WORDS

I had my follow-up appointment on July 30th, and my Cardiologist has scheduled me for a stress test on the 10th of September. I go in at 8:30 and then I will see him at 11:15 that same day.

He wanted to wait a little while to give my body time to heal from this last round of procedures before he pushed it anymore.

He told us that he feels that I am already in the range to be put on the transplant list, however he wants me to heal, and give myself a little more time, and once the stress test is done, he suspects that he will be taking the next steps to start the process.

I just do not have words to describe the feeling that you would have just being told this. I do not know that anyone would want this! However we are aware that we have done everything else that is medically possible to try and allow me some more time, but it just isn't working.

I have had friends ask me how I feel with this current news that the doctor has given me, and I have told them and I will tell you, I DO NOT KNOW!
I have so many feelings that I do not know where to even begin to process them. I have prayed for PEACE, WISDOM, & COMFORT.

I know that the Lord has all of this under control, so I turn to him and ask that I not stray from the truth. That he is all that matters, not this disease, or the upcoming tests, or surgeries.

I pray that you all will help me to focus on him and not on what the future holds.


This is how I feel at times.....

"The enemy pursues me,
he crushes me to the ground;
he makes me dwell in darkness
like those long dead.
So my spirit grows faint within me;
my heart within me is dismayed.
Psalm 143:3-4

But I need to remember this....

"Yet I am always with you;
you hold me by my right hand.
You guide me with your counsel,
and afterward you will take me into glory.
Whom have I in heaven but you?
And earth has nothing I desire besides you.
My flesh and my HEART may fail,
but GOD is the strenght of my HEART
and my prtion forever.
Psalm 73:23-26

New normal

So once again it has been a while. So to keep you updated this is what is going on...

On the Thursday the 8th of this month my sister brought my kids home from spending a few days in East Texas, she said that her and the new baby (Lane) where going to stay for the weekend to visit with us. I was thrilled about this, as I LOVE babies!!!!!

Rebecca was to leave on the 10th to go to church camp, and we were all having a good time. I had an appointment scheduled to see my Cardiologist on Friday the 9th, because I had not been feeling very well for about 2 weeks.

Travis and I both were having a hard time sleeping the night before. So needless to say we were both very nervous!
On Friday Travis left for work and I was to pick him up to go to go to my appointment..I got the kids their breakfast (cereal) nothing fancy as I had my best friends child (Maddox) here also cause it was her first day at work and her husband John was on his way home from the mission trip to Brazil!!!! Which was awesome!!!

Anyway enough rambling..I got in the shower around 8:20 or so, I needed to leave the house by 10:00 am to pick Travis up and then get to the appointment by 11:15am.
I am in the shower and I am washing my hair, I sudded it all up, and then I had to take a break because I started to feel my heart race, I sat down for a moment, and then stood back up and started rinsing my hair....once agian I felt my heart start to race.....

ZAP.....................................

Next thing I know I am screaming,

ZAP......................................

yelling now Michelle,

ZAP.....................................

Michelle my sister gets in the bathroom and I am laying on the floor ( I think ) maybe sitting trying to calm myself down.....

ZAP...................................


This was the last shock that I got from my ICD ( Inplantable Cardiac Difibrilator).

I remember looking at her thinking THIS IS IT!!!!!!!!!! I wanted to say so much, but I feared saying anything so that my heart rate would not go up again.

In the mean time she called 911, and got I think a towel and covered me up, as I was laying naked as a jaybird on my bathroom floor with 3 kids here and the ambulance on the way.

We had called Travis and he was on his way to the house.
I remember telling Michelle that I was ok, and that the ambulance did not need to come...(I was not wanting a bunch of men coming in and helping me as I lay naked on the floor).
Let me tell you now GOD was working in this the whole time..... Michelle was here for a reason.. to help me, and then the ambulance got here and they were all WOMEN. WOW HOW HE IS AMAZING!!!!! He knew what I was afraid of even when I didn't really know it. (of all things at that time to be worried about).

They did an EKG while I was still in the bathroom, and said they needed to get me to the nearest hospital as fast as they could......So here I go....Travis rode in the front of the Ambulance. (I really wanted him close, even if it was in the ambulance).

We wound up going to North Cypress Hospital, my Cardiologist had an ambulance sent for me to go to St. Lukes.. Thank God!!!!

I got to St. Lukes at about 11:45am..
I was not really aware that this was giong to be a week stay...but I guess that is what I needed.

I was put in CCU (Critical Care Unit) of the cardiac section. I finally got to see my Dr.'s around 6:05, and once again GOD came through. Wendy was there with me when they came in to talk to me. She was able to explain anything that I did not understand.

Dr. Kar
Dr. Hariharran
Dr. George
were all there for an entire hour....they said that my device shocked me because my heart rate was at 170-200 just from taking a shower, which obviously is way too high!
They decided to do an EP ( I do not know what that stands for.. you would have to ask Wendy) but they were going to up to my heart through veins in my groin and manipulate my heart to do what it had done to see if they could find the cause of the increase. This Procedure would be on Monday the 12th. If they did not find anything then it was most likely the deterioration of my disease causing the problem, and they would have to do another procedure on Tuesday to upgrade my device.

Mondy I can't eat or drink anything since I am having the procedure, and I finally get back there at about 7:00PM....UUGGHH,

Findings.....NOTHING.....

Tuesday I can't eat or drink anything again since I am having another procedure to upgrade my device. I thought they were just adding 2 more leads to my device, but it turns out that they took my device out and replaced it with a new one.....surgery finally happened again at about 6:30-7:00PM......

I do not remember much from the surgery. My Dr. did really well on the meds this time, and I did not wake up until I think I was in my room again.

So now I have a new device CRT ( Cardiac Resynchronization Therapy) device. It is constantly pacing me..(which yes I can feel).
I have been restricted from doing activities, driving, swimming, cleaning...

So I am once again at the mercy of my loving family to take care of me. I have amazing friends that have stepped up to the plate again. I just can't say thank you enough to them.

I also can't say thank you enough to my sister, Michelle. I do not know what I would have done without you here. I love you!!

I will end for now..I will also try and keep you all updated.

Thank you to everyone for your prayers, meals, flowers, visits, letters, cards, calls and well wishes...

I will continue to try and stay strong and not let this get me down too much....sometimes that is harder said than done.

In Christ
Brandy