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I will give you a new heart, and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone, and give you a heart of flesh.

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

FREEDOM!!!!!!!

Well I got out of the hospital last night on April 5, at about 7:45.. Thank goodness, I had been there since the two Fridays before. A total of 11 days. I believe that was enough!! I went in to the hospital because I was having some pain and discomfort in my chest. They wound up keeping me and doing a Right Heart Catheterization on this past Thursday to check to see if my pressures were high bad enough to go ahead and place my status higher on the Transplant list. If you have been following my story you will know that for me this is what I was praying for, because I am tired of feeling the way I have been feeling!! So we had everyone pray that they would say that we could proceed in that way. Well little did I know that that is not what God's plan is for me right now! So let me back up a little before I continue my hospital story. A few weeks ago as you all know I was in a PIT... I was utterly and completely done with the way I have been feeling. I wanted them to call and tell me that it was time for me to go in and have my transplant, I was even ok with having to stay at the hospital until it happened. WHAT WAS I THINKING!!!! I was reading some books while I was in the hospital and I came across something that really HIT me like a ton of bricks. "The enemy doubles his efforts when a break through is right around the corner." How true this is, I know now looking back that the enemy was using everything and anything to make me feel depressed, anxiety, mad, overwhelmed and just plain DONE!!! Regardless of what GOD wanted, I wanted what I wanted , when I wanted it!!! So back to the hospital, I was there a total of 11 days, in that time I had a total of 5 room mates. 4 of them were old women, and they all seemed pretty nice, one was just plain loud and obnoxious, but that is not what I wanted to tell you. My fourth roommate came the same day that I had my Catheterization done. I got back in my room at about 6-6:30. I thought that I would have the room to myself that night, which I was glad for because the night before was when I had the loud roommate, and needless to say I got NO sleep. At around 12:30 that night they brought in a new roommate, I thought ( you have to be kidding me ) I was so tired from the last 3 nights of roommates, but man does GOD work in wonderful and miraculous ways!!! The lady sounded so young, so when everyone left I prayed and GOD gave me the courage to ask through the curtain how old she was. The following was our conversation!! "Ma am I am sorry to bother you,but do you mind if I ask how old you are?" "sure, I am 31." "Really I am 32" "Wow really" "Yes, can I ask why you are here" As you all know being as young as we are we should not be in the cardiology floor!! "I have Cardiomyopathy." "Really, I have Cardiomyopathy!" "OH my goodness, that is weird." So on and on we go! How cool is it that GOD put a young lady in the same room with me that was my same age and also had the same sort of disease that I do!!!!!!!! Do you all remember way earlier when I talked about not having anyone to talk to that was going through the same stuff that I was and how it would be nice to have that, she struggles with the same thing!! Any way we became friends and have kept in touch and will continue too!!! She just had a defibrillator put in, that was what she had done that day. I am so thankful that GOD has given me another friend to add to my growing list!!! So that was Friday when she left, and I was there until the following Tuesday, because they were trying to get my blood levels therapeutic again....finally I could go home. I am still at a status 2 on the Transplant list, and they added another med to my med list. It has made a pretty big difference in the way that I feel. So that is wonderful. I actually hope that it not be too terribly soon that I have the transplant, cause I am feeling so much better for right now. I am good waiting on GOD!!!!! So that is what I am doing. I have talked to my doctor, and me and my new friend Jill are going to be starting a support group for young adults with Heart Failure, this is something that we both were looking for, and there are support groups out there, but they are all old people, and it is just completely different when there is that much of an age difference. When I mentioned this to my doctor, he was so excited and told me that he would help us!!!! I know that God kept me at the hospital for this reason!!!! I have been thinking and praying about this for a while now, and I am sure that this is what He is pushing me to do. I also know that HE will follow us in this journey!!! Thank you all for the prayers while I was in the hospital!!!! I know the plans I have for you" declares the LORD..plans to give you a hope and a future, and not to harm you" Jeremiah 29:11 "I have told you these things, so that in me , you may have peace. In this world you will have troubles, but take heart, I have overcome the World!!!! John 16:33 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding, in all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight! Proverbs 3:5-6

5 comments:

  1. What a great update! So cool about the support group--who knows how many others will be blessed by it. And I'm so glad to hear that you are feeling better. Praise the Lord!!!

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  2. I am so happy that you now have someone that can understand what you're going through! We also love you and are glad that you're out of the pokie =0)

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  3. Brandy - I am so glad you are home now. Since your last post saying that you were going back into the hospital I've been praying for you. And throughout times in my day I would just have this thought pop in my head, pray for Brandy. Praise God you are home now!

    I also read last night that sometimes we want God to work like a light switch, where we ask something in prayer, and like a light switch, we want it automatically answered. But how God is more like a baseball. How Babe Ruth would go up to bat and hit the ball and he would strike out or hit a foul...but if you stayed long enough for the game he would usually always hit an amazing home run.

    I was thinking about the universe tonight and how there is SO much out there that we cannot even see! We look up and see the moon and stars and think it's cool, but there is so much more that we can't even wrap our minds around. And I thought about how much God must be doing in each of our lives for those of us who search and seek Him...that we cannot even see or wrap our minds around what He is doing and what He is having to take place in our lives.

    Sorry this is so so long!! I'm praying for you!

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  4. Brandy~ As I sat here at work reading what you wrote I had my tears flowing...not tears of sadness but tears of joy!! I remember when I finally got it when Ronnie died that it wasn't about me ~ it was Gods plan and His will for that to happen to me and Sam & Jon and it has made me who I am today. And everything you go through it is all part of the big plan. His plan ! All I know is you are in His big ole' hands and that's the safest place to be. I love you so much my sweet Brandy~you will never ever know what you mean to me and what you have meant to me over the years.You simply amaze me ! Prayers every day for you and Travis and those sweet babies ! I love you sweetheart !
    ~~Terri~~
    Proverbs 25:11

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  5. Finally getting caught up on all my blogs. I just read your last four or five all in one sitting. And let me tell you how cool the difference is-- you start off trying to find peace, and this post about freedom sounds like a happy, excited woman! Thank you God for visible answers to prayers!

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